


Faith and mischievousness

by Eilisande



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Future Fic, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-03
Updated: 2021-01-03
Packaged: 2021-03-13 16:13:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,324
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28531269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eilisande/pseuds/Eilisande
Summary: It all started when a little girl from Nicodranas made a god out of a Fey. And, well, I don't need to tell you that was no ordinary thing. You don't become a god because one small child thinks you are one. But this little girl had extraordinary faith and thus the Traveler was born. And then, the little girl grew up.Or, how the Traveler's cult threatens to overwhelm the Empire and all Wildermount
Relationships: Jester Lavorre & The Traveler
Comments: 3
Kudos: 12





	Faith and mischievousness

**Author's Note:**

> Translation of one of my texts. Was largely made obsolete by the Rumblecusp arc, but you never know with those two...

So, here's the thing.

It all started when a little girl from Nicodranas made a god out of a Fey. And, well, I don't need to tell you that was no ordinary thing. You don't become a god because one small child thinks you are one. But this little girl had extraordinary faith and thus the Traveler was born. And then, the little girl grew up.

The story should end there. As children grow older, after all, they stop believing in a lot of things and who would believe in a god who has no temple, no representations and does not appear in any religious chronicle or story? Obviously, all that Traveler story was a scam. A big pile of lies. But no, the Traveler was able to convince the child, then the adolescent and the young adult that she was becoming that he was very much real. However, if Jester Lavorre had not possessed in her a reserve of faith large enough to compete with the most pious of all the Empire's clerics, it would have ended long ago. Even the most zealous defenders of the Raven Queen or Bahamut believe less firmly in the existence of their gods than she does. Any clergy in the Dwendalian Empire would be proud to have such a believer in their ranks. If any of them had spotted Jester Lavorre before she met the Traveler and managed to recruit her, her cult would probably have the predominance over all others within the Empire today.

I can tell that some of you want to protest. Listen to me carefully, do not interrupt me, and you will see that I am not exaggerating.

Oh, and try to cut off the Minister of Information once again, and you will hear from me.  
When Jester Lavorre was a child, the Traveler was a Fey with no more and no less power than any other Fey. Growing up, she prayed in his direction so much that he found himself able to listen to the prayers of multiple worshipers. Finding it pleasant to be revered by this child, the Traveler searched for other believers. He found some. Twenty years later, a new sect was born and that's when its existence reached the ears of our spies and, I imagine, yours as well. Do not deny it, high priests. We know well that each believer, each cleric is in some way a spy for his cult. We don't mind. After all, your cults are accepted in the Empire and the Empire, which I represent, has the best spy network there is.

Let's resume. We did not care about this child and this false god. You neither. It was, after all, only a small sect of about thirty worshipers scattered throughout the Empire and the Menagerie Coast and none of them represented any danger. Prostitutes, beggars, drunkards, petty thugs... None were important. Enforcing the law of the Empire, we arrested them, punished them and most agreed to recognize that the god they worshipped was a false one. Cults are born and die every day. This one was also going to disappear on its own. Even when the number of the Traveller's followers exceeded one hundred, no one worried. A few fines, a few lashes and they would come to their senses.  
Then Jester Lavorre left her hometown and started talking about the Traveler wherever she went. She told people about her god, and some of them began to listen. Again, we did not worry, but we did launch a few spies on her trail as a precaution. You have in front of you the transcript of some of Jester Lavorre's sermons. I see you smile as you read them. We also smiled. I have been fortunate to hear some of the finest lectures that you have ever given. I also had the misfortune of listening to some awful priests trying to convince their congregation. A bad sermon makes you fall asleep quickly. Jester Lavorre's early speeches aren't bad. They are beyond that. No one in their right mind could be convinced by anything coming out of her mouth.

But.  
But.  
As she and her adventurer group, the Mighty Nein, travelled and made contacts in all the Empire, the Traveler's cult expanded. Some of her followers, arrested and, let's say, questioned for more information, told us that they laughed when they heard Jester Lavorre talk about the Traveler, but thought about it often after her departure. Everyone we questioned converted in less than six months, without really knowing why. All have become fervent faithful and have set out to apply the Traveler's Way: do some mischief, play pranks, but help others. I agree with you, this is the dumbest divine message I have ever heard, but for some reason, it works.

We started to worry, but it was already too late.

It was too late since that little girl from Nicodranas decided that the Traveler was a god and that he would be hers. We could reunite all of the Traveler's known and suspected worshipers tomorrow and execute them, yes. By the way, they are now over ten thousand and more likely around thirty thousand. If Jester Lavorre escaped us, this security measure would have been for naught. Within ten years, the cult would reform, more powerful than before.

What allows me to say that, you ask? Reports from our spies. Tell me, how would even the most pious of clerics react if he found that his god is a sham and a fraud? Your grimaces confirm what I already know. He would lose his faith, gentlemen, quite simply. No one wants to learn that their god is a false one. We've all heard the story of clerics finding out that the whispers they heard were those of a demon. These stories always end badly, and not just for the priest.

However, we have received confirmation from a reliable informant that Jester has been told for years that the Traveler is a false god. Worse, he had enough faith in her faith to tell her the truth himself. Has she stopped believing? No. On the contrary. She decided to help him become a better god. Her faith was pure and unconditional, which is more than rare than you would like to believe, gentlemen.  
Here we are faced with the unthinkable: a cleric deceived by her god whom this deception strengthens in her faith. A priestess, teaching her god how to behave like one. It sounds like a bad joke, but I assure you that we take the situation very seriously because, since this realization, the number of the Traveler's believer has exploded. People who are looking for god and are disappointed with the ones you offer turn to the Traveler.

Be quiet.

Here is the first conclusion of my presentation: Jester Lavorre is perhaps the most devout person in the entire Dwendalian Empire. If she had joined an official cult and had taken to preaching in its name, I do not doubt that today half of the Empire would have joined that cult.  
Yes, I say that, and I can see ambition in your eyes. No need to start fomenting plans to convince her to deny her god and join yours. We've already tried. The Empire also tried to get rid of her, yes. Six times. The survivors returned traumatized, and many without their pants. Her god is now powerful enough to protect her. Even if he looked away at the right time, the Mighty Nein are a thorn in the Empire's side, one that cannot be extracted without damage. Worse, they protect each other. I refuse to lose more good and loyal assassins to achieve this.

I can see from your grimaces that some have tried to do the same. Without success, obviously.

So I come to the second part of my presentation.

Jester Lavorre, the Traveler and his followers cannot be stopped by conventional means, but they must be stopped. One way or another. They are a problem that can no longer be ignored because the whole Empire is aware of them. If we do nothing, everyone will laugh from Port Damali to Rosohna.

For you to understand the seriousness of the problem, I have had a list of all the problems caused by Jester Lavorre in the last six months only. I was not cruel enough to ask my secretaries to copy it for each of you. Yes, it is this heavy pile of records. If I had wanted to list all her actions for the year, I would have needed a bound book. You will allow me to read selected extracts from it.  
Let's see ... For the past six months, she has travelled throughout the west and south of the Empire and we should be happy that she spared Rexxentrum. I count here no less than ninety-two references to crude drawings made on the walls of temples or official buildings - and even once on the forehead of a tax collector - to which must be added sixty-seven bawdy songs uttered on the public square, some ridiculing local personalities, thirty-one identity thefts by abusing the powers conferred by one's god, twenty-nine attempts to celebrate the cult of the Traveler in the temple of another god, nineteen nocturnal, let's say, rowdiness. She also exchanged during the night all the contents of the shop of a fishmonger with that of a candle maker, ridiculed the guard of Trottenwald by blinding them in full ceremony with the help of her god, put pink dye in the laundry of the Cobalt Soul monks, tattooed the Traveler on the back of a sleeping nobleman in Zadash, drawn the Traveler's symbol on all the books in three different libraries and encouraged the inhabitants of a village to compose with her vulgar songs to the glory of the Traveler. There is not a town or village in the Empire where she is not wanted for blasphemy, vandalism or disturbing public order. I'm not exaggerating, my services have checked. Twice.

I see that this childishness makes some of you laugh. I might laugh too if it wasn't the dignity of the Empire that was at stake. People are talking about Jester Lavorre now, all over the Empire. People are proud to claim they witnessed or endured one of her tricks. Merchants who arrive somewhere right after she leaves complain that they missed her. The truth is, since Jester Lavorre first made the talk fifteen years ago, she's been singing about the Traveller's strengths so much that a new problem has arisen.

She became convincing.

People say of the Traveler that he is, I quote "the god of this funny and kind Tiefling" before asking themselves if this is not a cult worthy of them. Now, people come from afar to hear her talk about the Traveler, and she is followed from town to town by a growing crowd. An entire village has converted in less than a week. In Zaddash, Guardsmen agreed to nail posters announcing the Traveler's next meeting of worshipers to the barracks walls! She even invites the Traveler to come and meet people she considers promising and he obeys her! We have never seen such acts since the birth of the Empire. Your gods, at least, have the courtesy to stay away. Not the Traveler. No, Jester Lavorre has created a cult from scratch and is gathering more and more followers. Each meeting of the Traveler's followers brings together more followers and even begins to attract the curious. And all of these people are struggling to copy the behaviour of what should be called their high priestess. They think that being mischievous is an act of faith to the Traveler and compete in idiocy to get them to notice. The more daring Jester Lavorre is, the more they feel compelled to outbid her.

To limit the contagion, very clear instructions were sent to the four corners of the Empire. No more city is supposed to welcome Jester Lavorre, even for one night. Several did so despite everything to avoid a revolt of their citizens or because they feared what she would draw on their doors and walls.

This is the second conclusion of my presentation. Jester Lavorre is a public danger. She ridicules the Empire, the army, religion and public order. It is too many crimes for one person. We failed to murder her so other means must be found to stop her. Jester Lavorre seems to be unstoppable, but I think I've found a way to contain her.

That's why I recommend accepting the Traveler as one of the official gods of the Dwendalian Empire. Don't interrupt me. I recommend to accept the cult of the Traveler and to propose to Jester Lavorre the title of high priestess of this cult and to invite her to sit here, with you at the great religious council of Rexxentrum. I also propose that you give her one of your temples for her god.

According to the projections established by our specialists, this is the best, and perhaps the only, way to prevent them from doing more damage. At least we can limit the problem and the number of her contacts.

I hope.

Oh, and I also count on you to keep watch over her at all times and keep her from accessing our revered king. Do you complain that he despises your cults? Wait and see what happens if Jester Lavorre gets it into her pretty head to talk to him about the Traveler.

You wanted your cults to be officially recognized by the Empire? Perfect. We have fulfilled your wishes and you are richer than ever. But Empire's tolerance comes at a price. You see, Jester Lavorre is now your problem. It's up to you to make her too distracted to continue converting the people of the Empire.

Gentlemen, High Priests, I wish you a very nice day.


End file.
